Update

Here's the latest:God is still good, He's still on the throne and we are still breathing in His goodness. OK that's not new ;-). But here's what is. We're doing well, as well as one can be in our situation. Things still are different and there are many times that I want Doug to walk back in and just take over (don't tell him that, it could go to his head, lol!). His birthday came and went and was amazing...our gift from above was a new born baby born on that day. We tease that if Doug were here he wouldn't EVER let it go!

There's still "firsts" that are happening and it stinks, but again God is good and we will overcome! We did survive the first birthday without him, yet there are still things like moving, playing softball and more holidays. The kids handle this all so differently. Lizzie doesn't seem to recognize it, while Joey instantly shuts down somewhat. That's what happened tonight, I mentioned that softball was coming up (realizing myself that it would be different and it still stinks without him) and Lizzie voiced her opinion of it taking too long ("I get bored" is her response) while Joey looked at me and got quiet. I asked him what was going on and he said, "memories" - I wanted to tell him then (I told him later though) that while we are reminded of old memories we are making new ones. And though it stinks without our Big Daddy we know that the new memories will help make the transition easier, all while not replacing the old memories.