Camp and other thoughts...

"Write", He says. "Write what?" I ask. I sit in a room, all to myself and wonder just exactly He wants me to write. But that's all I get. The Lord is mysterious and glorious all in one and I'm not sure what He wants me to do. But one thing I do know is that He wants me to write. So, write I shall.

So many thoughts roaming through my head, yet one rings out the loudest: my children. They are on their annual camping trip with the church. I know they're going to have a blast and miss me a little, yet one thought screams out at me: THIS IS MY GIRL'S FIRST YEAR! I'm so nervous, so anxious and honestly I want to go and get her! But I know that I can't do that. She probably wouldn't protest too much, but that would be just plain embarrassing! I don't recall being this way with the boy; when it was his first year I pretty much pushed him out! Yet that was a different time, with a different child. He's my healthy version of a mama's boy and once he said he wanted to go to camp I jumped at it! And I was nervous, but I knew that if I fostered the 'mama's boy' in him then he would fit the stereotype and I did not want that! And, their dad was alive.

This is not only her first year at camp, but also her first real time being away from BOTH mom and dad without another relative nearby. Yes, her brother is there; but let's be honest...he's a boy! I did make mention for him to watch out for her and make sure she was OK and all, but still.

So, as we're getting loaded up and ready to go I see the signs. The signs of, "I don't really like this, but I'm going to do it anyway" rising in my girl. I've learned just how different these two can be since Doug's home-going and she deals with things in a particular way. She'll get real hyper and kind of clingy and in your face and over the top with things...that's how she was. So, my prayer is that this evening as they're all winding down in their cabins my girl will find a counselor she can trust and become a shadow with.

I kind of miss my little shadow...